Family-Date? Grab These Things
I’m a fan of screen time; it for sure has its place. It has been a life saver, especially those oddly addicting and soothing baby sensory videos on YouTube for those horrific moments in the car when the baby is crying because there was yet another accident on those equally horrific freeways in Los Angeles. But even I have my boundaries with screen time and one of those hard lines I draw (for now) is when we’re out eating or enjoying the occasional brewery-- those are our family dates. My expectation is that we are out to enjoy the environment, the food and drink, and most importantly each other. And that can’t happen if I expect the kids to “just behave” or expect the kids to “act like grown-ups” because they aren’t grown-ups and behaving is also a construct of what we think they should be doing, often not thinking about what they are capable of doing. In grad school we talked a lot about setting our students up for success, providing scaffolds and differentiations for the lessons we planned and I approach our family dates with the same thought and intention.
I’m victorious at setting the kids up for success because of other people’s vision and tenacity in creating fantastic products for kids– it feels like teamwork; and I believe teamwork makes the dream work. Below are the items I grab (or my husband grabs) and that the kids are hopeful we throw into the “Mama’s Motherish Activity Bag,” (now available under the “Goods” tab or click the link) as they have named the tote-bag I consistently use to stash the items for success and fun!
(Also, I’m not being paid to promote anything; I share what works for me and my family, hoping it helps out you and your family-dates.)
Colorama
Colorama is a mama-created and operated business; and once she was local to me (I do miss the porch pick up option) but she moved her business and family to Tennessee. However, she didn’t let moving mishaps or Covid slow her down in either production or creativity. I’m a loyal patron to all the things she sells: resin letters, play dough kits, alpha mats and kid chops but what keeps me coming back is her genius “Dough on the Go Jars.” I grab a jar per kiddo and throw them in the tote. They are excited about what jar I grab. They play together at the table, often exchanging pieces, and even, in the truest sense of collaboration they use all goods to create lavish and imaginative scenes. In fact, my husband and I get in on the play because I enjoy letting my inner child out while at a grown up place– it feels like a perfect combination.
Melissa & Doug
I’m confident Melissa & Doug are a household name for all of us, which makes sense considering they make some really incredible toys. But my favorite grab for the infamous activity-tote-bag is “My First Paint with Water” books. I can grab one book, filled with 24 pages, and throw in a couple extra paintbrushes and confidently know that the kids will be delighted at the idea of asking for a small dish of water and extra napkins for their painting. I encourage the kids to ask (or as we say advocate) for themselves, practicing their confidence and people skills. My kids are one and half, three and half, and nearly six and painting with water is a win all-around. The six year old now approaches the page with skill and care, rinsing the brush meticulously between each color. My three and half year old relishes in the ease in which her creation comes to life. And my one and half year old… Well, she enjoys sucking the water off the paintbrush in between the strokes on the page.
KiwiCo
There are so many subscription boxes available. We really enjoy Kids Art Box and Oyster but in our experience KiwiCo is the box to grab for dining out. The box has all the things you need included, which isn’t unique but convenient. KiwiCo (currently we are at the Koala and Kiwi levels) really provides activities that are a true collaboration. So, if we toss in the tote our six year olds box (Kiwi) then that is something we will have to be involved with and can delegate tasks for everyone, which is fun and I recommend for breweries or wineries. However, the real parent-win is selecting the box for our three and half year old (Koala) because it needs less involvement from us and the older kid can delegate the tasks– cheers. Lastly, I’ve learned the unfortunate way that sometimes boxes do require some other items, so I suggest checking that first.
Scratcher paper
I have a thing about scratchers, in part because I always hope the ticket will be a winner and because I really enjoy scratching off the silvery coating. So, when I stumbled across scratch paper for scratch art– I was very excited… for the kids. For us, scratch paper is a great throw in the tote activity because it’s a win for every kid. The oldest enjoys games of Tic-Tac-Toe, the middle kid enjoys creating pictures for me, and the baby, well she enjoys sucking on the wooden pencil. Like many things in life, I snag scratch paper via Amazon.
Books
The unsung heroes of children activities– books. I have all the kids select a few books. Often, they pick their most favorite books, which is what you want because then they know the story, and that my mom-friends is the key to success at dinner because it allows you to encourage that they tell you the story or tell each other the story. I have read stories to them too (and this has always been applauded by strangers) but the truth of the reason is having a story to focus on is a joy compared to focusing on correcting behavior or telling them what they can’t do or what they should do or noticing how long the food is taking or … you get the idea.
These things have helped us enjoy our outings and look forward to family-dates. As the kids grow their needs will change and we will adjust. I’m thankful that I have a system that works for us and I look forward to the day I can retire the Motherish Tote bag and have a family date filled with conversation and ease… and unassisted toilet visits.