Mindfulness for Kids: The 5 Books We Reach For
Before I was a parent, I dabbled in meditation and mindfulness but it wasn’t a practice I fully understood or valued; let’s face it, motherhood is a demanding full-contact endless endeavor and I was dealing with some major family of origin shit. I was having debilitating anxiety attacks; the kind of anxiety attacks that felt as though I was going to drop dead because my body had forgotten how to get enough air and my heart would stop beating, and then, my kid eating in their high chair would see me collapsed on the ground and in an attempt to help me would climb out of her high chair, thoroughly cracking her head open on the ground… even now, I take a pause while I’m writing this to take a deep breath, remembering that I’m here and now, and not there. The attacks were scary and a good indicator that I needed help, so I found a therapist and in our two years together we did a lot of work and we started with the practices of mindfulness, meditation, and breathing. As I learned and experienced the benefits of these practices I was called to teach my kids because they deserved to be equipped with the skills and tools to handle their feelings now… and forever.
Of course, whenever I want to teach the girls something new I turn to books and I feel so fortunate that I’m parenting in an era where there is a book for everything! As a devotee to words-- my undergrad was in English-- I’m a bit of a book snob and I’ve been known to tell the kids, “No, I won’t read that book again,” or “Nope. I won’t read that book, the story really isn’t that great and I think we have so many better options.” (I’m a believer in boundaries--thank you therapy-- and I set them with my children.) So, I ordered a handful-- maybe a couple handful-- of books and have selected our top five. These books are the ones the kids grab for reading time; these books have provided skills to use during challenging moments; these books have embedded phrases that we use regularly; these books make parenting and being a kid a bit easier because they all remind us to breathe.
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Breathe Like A Bear boasts of 30 mindful moments for kids to feel calm and focused anytime, anywhere-- and if I’m being honest, it works for grownups too. The book is divided into five sections: Be Calm, Focus, Imagine, Make Some Energy, and Relax. Each section has various breathing, grounding, and mindfulness exercises, which are accompanied by bold, fun, and beautiful illustrations. Depending on why we are grabbing Breathe Like A Bear off the shelf we have two strategy approaches to how we use its tools. If we are just in the mood to encourage and practice some self care we flip the pages until the selected kid says stop, and then, we do the exercise on that page. If we are reaching for the book because somebody is having some big feelings, we look at the table of contents, and visit the appropriate section and perform an exercise that will target the need. Either way, the book has taught us many great exercises that we have committed to memory and are thankful that we have in our back pocket at a moment’s notice. Our family favorite is Flower Breath!
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I just recently added this book to our arsenal of mindfulness books, and already we are quoting from the book, which is a good sign that the book is impactful. I appreciated that Calm and Peaceful Mindful Me took the time to explain what mindfulness is, how it’s beneficial, and that it can be practiced anywhere-- in language and with illustrations that small children can understand. They show a kid at the grocery store practicing mindfulness and I adore that they normalize the use of skill in a non-challenging situation, which allows for practice in a non-stressful way. So, when shit is hitting the fan, asking the kid to take some balloon breaths will resonate and be productive. Additionally, each page has suggested questions to ask your kid, and I’m thankful for the extra support to create a dialogue with my kid.
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As a parent, I’m always worried about my kids being treated poorly--by anyone. As a parent, I’m always on a mission to equip my kids with the skills to change and reframe their mindset because they can’t change the mindset of those around them. So, I value Breathing is My Superpower discusses all kinds of feelings brought on by others and the narratives they can create internally and the book validates those feelings; and perhaps, most importantly, provides a solution on how to move forward and through. Breathing, while using your hand as a guide engages the superpower of acknowledging and releasing unhelpful feelings or thoughts. And the book does a great job of showing kids that they can and should talk about their feelings.
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I often listen to guided meditations, and in fact, during the beginning of my therapy my husband would guide me through meditations, grounding exercises, and mindfulness practices; I felt like this provided an additional layer of support, encouragement, and safety, which is why I added The Light Inside You to my favorite picks. This book allows you to guide your child through meditation. Your voice is familiar. Your presence is love. Your guidance is connection.
Within the first few pages My Magic Breath is instilling confidence within the reader by exclaiming, “WOW! You do have the magic breath!” I remember the big smiles my kids had when they felt affirmed for their big breath. To try something new, even breathing with intent, can feel scary, so starting the book out with an injection of assurance is applaud worthy. As you continue to read the book you can discover so much about your kid, their feelings, their day, their thoughts because My Magic Breath slips questions into the story, which makes this a great bedtime read; the combination of identifying, affirming, and breathing really is magic.